I didn't ask to be secretary of balloon doggies, the balloon doggies demanded it!

Few people in the world get to hit their bosses but those who do will tell you it is better than sex.

Bitch, I ain't no fucking G, I'm a cannibal!
I ain't trying to shoot you, I'm trying to chop you into pieces and eat you!

There you are, you bad kitty!

Love. Hygiene. That's the important thing. Hygiene. The toughest thing in the world: [you] have to turn to your mate one night and say: "You gotta wash your ass!" Shit. Knowing how difficult it is, I said it for you : You Gotta Wash Your Ass.

[Lil Rel Howery: The Tunes win! The Tunes win!] [Ernie Johnson Jr.: Unbelievable! Al-G just got turned into a literal poster.] This is not how I wanted to go out!

What the fuck? Easy boy, you're not well! Hey, listen Ricky, the bit about the broccoli, I was just kidding. Seriously, want a drink? No! No! NOOOO!

Are You Being Served?

Alok tried to ask the professor for a re-quiz, who stared back as if he had been asked for both his kidneys.

What did you just say? "Chai tea?!" "Chai" means "tea", bro! You're saying "tea tea!" Would I ask you for a coffee-coffee with a room of cream-cream?

[After Holmes fires all ammo at Lord Blackwood] What was that about saving bullets?

[to Evian] Go drink a bottle of yourself!

[https://www.cartooningforpeace.org/en/dessinateurs/adene/ On Cartooning for Peace]

I would have loved to have been on the Band Aid record but I only heard about it when I was in Germany. I don’t know if they would have had me on the record anyway, because I’m a bit old.
I’m just an old slag who gets up every morning, scratches his head and wonders what he wants to fuck.

[On husbands sharing their wives' childbearing experience] Unless you're passing a bowling ball, I don't think so. Unless you're trying to circumcise yourself with a chainsaw, I don't think so. Unless you're opening an umbrella up your ass, I don't think so!

No matter how much makeup I wore, people just kept saying "Yes, sir! Would you like tea with that, sir?" "Yes, I would like tea. Why don't you put it on my breasts?" "Certainly. Tea for this man's breasts! Anything else, sir?